The Bigger Picture


The Bigger Picture

By Joseph P. Battaglia

Image courtesy of franky242 /

You got up the other day after a night of not sleeping well. You couldn't sleep because of an argument that occurred with a coworker or family member.  So, you just knew this was going to be a bad day and nothing you could do was going to make it better.

Later that morning, your customer was being difficult. Everything you said was “not satisfactory.” Everything you did to make it right was just not good enough. Finally the customer stormed out in a huff. It took all you had to not respond in kind.

What do these situations have in common? Each person acted like a human being, with all the emotions and frailties that go with it. We all have good and bad feelings and “hot buttons.” Unfortunately (or fortunately), it’s part of the price we pay for being human.

One solid gold lesson I’ve learned is that when someone gets upset and jumps down your throat, it almost never—scratch that—it never has anything to do with you. There is always another reason why that person reacted that way. They are simply replaying a past experience or prejudice in their mind, and it could be they didn't get much sleep either.


Coaching Tip:

When tempers flare, when emotions get out of control, STOP.  Recognize the emotion and ask yourself, “What is the bigger picture here? Why is the other person reacting this way?" It almost certainly has nothing to do with you. Be the rational one and don’t take it personally. Remember, what comes out of someone’s mouth has everything to do with them and almost nothing to do with you.

About the Author:

Joe BattagliaJoseph P. Battaglia is a Relationship Coach and co-owner of Living the Dream Coaches, LLC, in Scottsdale, AZ.

Joe works with people over 40 who are ready to transform their lives and their relationships. E-mail:

Phone: 888-505-5762 Website: